greekfamilyminimarket

My summer working in the family business on Corfu

The Last Post – be warned X

on October 4, 2012

I think it’s fair to say that I’m allowed one truly angry blog before I go. I’ve done the spin of trying to find everything amusing for far too long.
So, what is the truth?

As a recent new acquaintance said to me who is South African, but lived here for 35 years – “This place was a paradise – now it is a shithole. People want to eat each other’s heads for money, for the little money we have left. It’s all about jealousy, and poverty and desparation. It is an island built on dreams and we all came and shat on each other’s dreams”.

I couldn’t speak when he said this. Because I agree. Because of how things are, we have turned on each other. No one has the balls anymore to turn to a man on the street and say “Would you like a hand?” No judgment, no evaluation, just “do you need help?”.

That was the principle on which I came here. That is what I love about Corfu. It is old school. It’s a mad, insane place that flouts the rules, it is the best of Greece. It was also, always a kind mistress, someone who said “and I’ll take you too…”.
Until now.

We all have our faults, and our problems, our struggles and our mistakes. When the very people you thought loved you turn on you, then you are more depleted than I could possibly here describe. When you are that person who gave unconditionally to a village, to its people, to the culture, to a family, with understanding and above all love, and you are denounced as a whore, then anger arises.

You are goddamn right I’m angry. Love does not beget love? What world is this? Congratulations family, you won. I lost. Now go forth and conquer and hold so close to your heart the knowledge that you also corrupted the next generation into paranoia, negativity and doubt. Congratulations. I’m off.

I will take my son to a new, very scary world. It will be full of struggle – but, and this is how bad it gets – I deeply hope it will be one without the psychological terror that Corfu has become here.

This is what the crisis has done to people here. It rendered all of us weak, and blameworthy – we have turned on each other. From fear. We do not have a future here, no matter how hard we fight. Is it just about money? NO. When people get angry they want someone to blame. In my family it’s me. In the country it’s Merkel, the government, the next door neighbour. Stop it now.

Just love, just love. Forgiveness, concessions and empathy. That’s how you run a country, and that’s how you make a family. Start at home, and then you build.

May I finish by quoting my fabulous mother in law, a true emblem of the nation, when she said this – (I had begged her to talk to me as woman, pleaded with her to tell me what more, what else I could do for the family, I was on my knees looking up at her lovely face) –

“Please wear nice shoes”

I rest my case.

It’s 1986. I am on a boat with my Mum. We look over the edge, and I say “Mummy, that is the most beautiful blue I have ever seen”. I will never forget the water. We will be back.
You will hear from me in England next XX

How ’bout getting off these antibiotics
How ’bout stopping eating when I’m full up
How ’bout them transparent dangling carrots
How ’bout that ever elusive kudos

Thank you India
Thank you terror
Thank you disillusionment
Thank you frailty
Thank you consequence
Thank you thank you silence

How ’bout me not blaming you for everything
How ’bout me enjoying the moment for once
How ’bout how good it feels to finally forgive you
How ’bout taking you upon your support

Thank you India
Thank you terror
Thank you disillusionment
Thank you frailty
Thank you consequence
Thank you thank you silence

The moment I let go of it was the moment
I got more than I could handle
The moment I jumped off of it
Was the moment I touched down

How ’bout professing just how much you love me
How ’bout taking him up on a back-massage
How ’bout unabashedly bawling your eyes out
How ’bout grieving it all one at a time

Thank you India
Thank you terror
Thank you disillusionment
Thank you frailty
Thank you consequence
Thank you thank you silence

How ’bout no longer being masochistic
How ’bout remembering your divinity
How ’bout reflecting each-other in our last splendor
How ’bout not equating death with stopping

Thank you India
Thank you clarity
Thank you disillusionment
Thank you nothingness
Thank you consequence
Thank you thank you silence

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3 responses to “The Last Post – be warned X

  1. Bean says:

    Yes, Loobet, I’m hearing you. The picture is vivid. Get thee to a better life my sweetheart, you can do it. X X

  2. My sweet Looby, I am really sad that you had to experience so many struggles and such hardships here on our beautiful island of Corfu. You so much deserve a wonderful life full of love and happines and I hope that you will find it soon, and that you will have the chance to erase the pain and sorrow of everything that you are going through.

    I sincerely wish that you could have experienced Corfu the way I did since the very first time I set foot on the island – as a small paradise, with so many things to offer. After having lived here for 15 years, I still have the same love and passion for it. It is still inspiring me to deliver some of my best artistic work, the latter of which you also have been a part of in a wonderful way, with us sharing our bursts of creativity through the Vagina Monologues as well as the whimsical Land of Woccabocca. And now, with “Mozarelius” and “Kick the Clock” coming up, your great presence and creative input will certainly be missed a lot!

    Please keep in contact and let me know your whereabouts on the many journeys awaiting you. I love you and admire you for everything that you are and I have always been so proud of you for what you stand for.

    Louise
    xxx

    PS: I must see you before you go – give me a call asap.

  3. I may have one last blog in me regarding the love for this island…. thankyou louise X

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