My summer working in the family business on Corfu

We shall fight them on the beaches

on July 13, 2012

Business has taken a very interesting turn – we are actually busy. It’s gone completely manic down here. We have these groups of robotic German kids, and I mean hundreds of them, marching into the place every other day, silently invading and thankfully spending some money. Thank God for the Germans. Yes, I am very tempted to make a Monty Pythonesque joke at this point, but we mustn’t mention the war. Or the invasion of Poland.

This situation has rendered me, for want of better words, completely screwed. I’m not only in the mini market. After about lunchtime, I go down to the bar and practically run the place while Jimmy soldiers on (sorry, can’t help myself), along with Chrisanthi, a fellow soldier, making burgers for the troops (I really can’t help myself making puns about this).

Prokopis, Jimmy’s brother, is also there, but he himself admits “my mind is not here”, and so there is great confusion about who has paid or not, which burger is for number 256, and whether that SEX ON THE BEACH has to go to a Greek or a German.  (“WHO’S HAVING THE SEX?” I’ve been known to call out).

Anna, (my great friend who works there in the bar) is not only an excellent worker, but has a great sense of humour. The other day, when we were in the middle of serving about 200 of them, both of us shouting out numbers to unresponsive German kids, I called out for the umpteenth time


Anna proceeded to start hysterically laughing, as did I, and for a moment the whole system was about to collapse as we went to the floor, crying and screaming tears of hysteria.

This would all sound like a form of fun, if it weren’t for the fact that any money made doesn’t come to us. It’s all for XXXXXX and XXXXX.

Oh, I forgot to tell you. I had some good advice about this blog being too personal and that perhaps it would be better to censor myself somewhat. On that note, XXXXX was dying her hair again the other day. This time, the plastic bag was blue. Good to see she changes colour.

And as for XXXXXX, well, he does nothing while all this business is going on. Occasionally, someone will ask – “Where the fuck is XXXXXX?”. I tell them, “He’s playing Bazouki, his instrument, in his room, but be honest, would you want him here anyway?”.

XXXXX has been lying to everyone about her age. She told Magda, the cook in the kitchen, that she is 52. She told Emilia, my fellow mini market worker, that she is 54. To top it off, she told me (supposedly family) the other day that she is fifty five.

Guys, she is 61. She should be proud of it.

And yes, goddamn it, XXXXX and XXXXXX are still very young.

CHURCHILL –  (sorry, really can’t help myself, and I actually love Germans, this is edited obviously)

“I have, myself, full confidence that if all do their duty, if nothing is neglected, and if the best arrangements are made, as they are being made, we shall prove ourselves once again able to defend our Island home, to ride out the storm of war, and to outlive the menace of tyranny, if necessary for years, if necessary alone.

At any rate, that is what we are going to try to do. That is the resolve of His Majesty’s Government-every man of them. That is the will of Parliament and the nation.

The British Empire and the French Republic, linked together in their cause and in their need, will defend to the death their native soil, aiding each other like good comrades to the utmost of their strength.
We shall fight on the seas and oceans,
we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight on the beaches,
we shall fight on the landing grounds,
we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight in the hills;
we shall never surrender, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this Island or a large part of it were subjugated and starving, then our Empire beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the British Fleet, would carry on the struggle, until, in God’s good time, the New World, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the old.”


One response to “We shall fight them on the beaches

  1. Diane says:

    Go girl, go!! We have our own little battle going here with Corina in hiding from the enemy. They’ve all been told to hide out till twelve tonight by which time they should be safe from immediate arrest! Cannot fucking believe it!! Only place to turn is to Monty P. XX

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